When Marie Kondo starts organizing a home she starts by greeting it and thanking it. I started to do that on the homepage of my blog, I acknowledged the homepage as a “dungeon” of my own mind. My mind isn’t so morose or anything, I say dungeon because of the metaphorical way that we are all imprisioned within our perspectives, that our senses aren’t fact, but interpretation ext, that we can’t experience the world directly or know exactly what are in other people’s hearts and minds. I think it’s very challenging to live in this time of great technological transition, there must have been a comfort in using the same technology that your grandparents and parents used, being able to learn from teachers who had a good grasp of the material, since they had time to digest it and play with different examples. When my father was young they didn’t believe in dinosaurs, when I was young genetics wasn’t a part of school, I took it in college, now my daughter is growing up with a better grasp of both genetics and paleontology than was available to the experts of the past. It’s great, but also taxing on our minds, and stressful to our bodies to have so much information overload as the status quo. For all of us growing up with sticks and cans for toys, living in this tablet, 3D printer world is understandably overwhelming. The begining step should have been to thank my mind for helping me know my loved ones, do what I do on a daily basis and remembering what is important to me (I did that at dawn for the first time).
When I discarded my old avatars and profiles this past week, I made peace with who I am now, older than before, but more happy, more balanced and less shy. As I chose my new universal profile (for gravitar, Facebook, Linkedin, Pinterest, Google) I scrolled through my photos and drawings looking at who I was before and how I looked then, and who I am now and how I look now. I was able to let go of my past youth and mentally move on to the 2019 me. I wanted to use just one avatar to represent my authenticity, whether or not a particular style would be better for marketing doesn’t matter to me, I’m comfortable with who I am without makeup ext. No offense to people who like makeup, it just isn’t me to care about it in real life and I want the digital world to organize my real life, not exist as a seperate facade. Discarding my past self along with my past avatar, helped me become more whole in this moment because it gave me time to reform a subconsious narative of this current chapter in my own life story.