Today’s goal: Adding meaning to the week…

Hypothetically smoking the word: “myth” today.

Most of my life I didn’t know why the English days of the week were so weird to spell or what they were based on.

This year I looked it up, they are German Gods. It’s interesting that while Christianity defined the years of the world for most of the world, the ancient Norse religion still holds the days of the week.

Recently I started crash course Mythology (with Mike Rugnetta) which chooses to consider both Christianity and the big bang theory for their stories without commenting on the veracity of either. I think that’s interesting and useful, I had to do that during art history in college. Much of older art is religious, but you don’t have to be religious to enjoy it, though you do end up learning a bit of the symbolism or terminology for art, and especially for history.

Mythology is generally defined as:

1. A collection of myths, especially one belonging to a particular religious or cultural tradition.
2. The study of myths.

• Mythos (from Greek) means story [maybe true, maybe not]

Crash course defines myth as a story (mythos, from Greek, means story). It may be true, may be not true, but “the story will have significance and staying power which is a testament to the deep meaning or functional importance these stories have to the people who hear and tell them.”

Myth can be difficult to discuss, because it can be offensive, and I don’t really like to be offensive, honestly (I just want you to agree with everything I think without being offended “joke”), but I also find mythology interesting, ever since I was a girl, and also it’s kind of a “writer hack” to see what makes the unforgettable stories unforgettable.

One of the things I didn’t care for about this pandemic, was the week I used to have, got shattered into bits.

I really feel I need a “week” that has little unique aspects to get me past drudgery of chores psychologically.

One of the things that always picks me up in dark times of depression, illness, or pain is the beauty of the seasons.

Likewise having special days of the weeks in something I love.

My husband is home Saturday and Sunday, I teach school Monday – Friday at home, but I didn’t want a week that was:

husband day, school, school, school, school, school, husband day.

Some of the little things we have that are weekly are: family movie night Friday, family team meeting Sunday (or at least watching Nanny 911 together), eating as much ice cream and candy as we want Saturday (not much surprisingly), a writers meeting 12-2 PM Saturday – for me (via Zoom or Google Meet), “Dino Dana” or some kids show (normally not allowed) Saturday – for my daughter.

Those things all help me enjoy life surprisingly a lot.

Because it lets me get excited for everyday Friday, Saturday, Sunday of the year instead of just my birthday (actually I don’t get excited for my birthday at all anymore).

52 weeks a year x 3 days a week I get excited about = 156

If I have enough saved I give to the orphans on Sunday, 2 pretty cool things Sunday (possibly helping orphans, and family team meeting, 2 pretty cool things Saturday (writers meeting, and ice cream), 2 cool things Friday (a board game ie the sneaky snaky squirrel game, and a movie the winner picks).

So about 42% of the days of my life are exciting, at least to me…

It doesn’t always take big things, sometimes small things are quite valuable as long as they are the right things.

I would like to make school more exciting so the kids will really enjoy learning, I would like to make my daily life more exciting so I will enjoy these days that will someday be gone…

For me one way to do that is by having “daily themes” maybe you noticed?

I like love Mindfulness Monday, I like love Transformation Tuesday, I love World of Wordcraft Wednesday, but Thursday and Friday are less… polished, as is See the Good Sunday.

Perhaps I’ll do a satire Saturday for comics?

I’m not sure yet.

But even having Mindfulness Monday, Transformation Tuesday, and World of Wordcraft Wednesday does get me “jazzed up,” so honestly I do get 42% excited by just those “silly” writing themes. So rather than having something to look forward to 42% of the time thanks to my family and friends, I have 84% excitement due to the excitement of wordcraft.

Thursday is the hold out. I don’t hate “Tech Talk Thursday,” not at all, but it doesn’t resonate the same way the other days do.

I guess I’m finding that I’m authentically passionate about mindfulness and transformation, but although I sometimes find tech useful, and amazing, and fun, it is more of a valid struggle, than an excitement.

Mindfulness and transformation resonate with my soul, yet tech helps me manifest my soul and heart in the real world.

So, it’s different, quite different.

I don’t know how it reads as a reader, but as a writer, it’s much different. I actually am all excited to not skip my Monday article, yet Thursday it’s not a big deal if I were to miss a week and come back to it. I don’t dread coming back to it, yet it’s so different internally.

If I knew what I wanted to write, it wouldn’t “have to” start with the same letter as the day of the week, but sense I don’t, it helps me brainstorm:

I’m thinking of Traumatic Thursday, or TedTalk Thursday, or Travel Thursday, or Think About It Thursday… I don’t know yet. Transition Thursday… Taking Action Thursday? Teenage Mutant Turtle Thursday? Throw Back Thursday? Trading Stocks Thursday? Thank you Thursday? Too Much Information Thursday? Totally Tardigrades Thursday?

Anyways…

Ever since I bought my fancy-ish planner for 2020 at CVS, I wanted to have my value of the day and subject of the day figured out, it’s been about 8 months, and now I’m at the first draft stage.

I frequently want to have life and myself figured out much before I do have them figured out… but at least I keep trying and get there.

For now I’ve got:

Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday

Integrity Mindfulness Transformation Meaning Purpose Love Inspiration

WORDS CAN HEAL

Putting a word to the day, that means something to me, was really healing against the trauma of having the old lifestyle shattered so abruptly (for an indefinite amount of time). This is something I like, that is pretty pandemic-proof.

WORDS CAN MAKE LIFE LESS OVERWHELMING

Also I was so overwhelmed trying to teach science to the kids, because we do a STEAM based curriculum (science, tech, engineering – though that is science, so that’s weird, art, math and motor). STAM? and if Math is science or technology then STA? Anyways our new science rotation is:

Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday

Astronomy Chemistry Anatomy Physics Biology Economics Paleontology

WORDS CAN AMUSE

Having a value to each day is really nice, today being “meaning” for me.

I though because I wasn’t passionate about my past jobs that they were keeping me from finding my meaning in life, then I came upon many people saying that you never “find” meaning in life, you have to ascribe it “write in the answer” you have to “make it”.

As I tried, and I found that was true for me. In my life I had no meaning, because I didn’t personally find meaning in bad experiences, I didn’t find meaning in service that builds skills.

I still don’t enjoy poring over every bad thing looking for a life lesson, I still don’t enjoy service “the most” and I still don’t love when I don’t have the skills I would need to do something I want to do yet, but I’m more open to all of them and that allows me to the as is life I have right now, much more than I ever have.

WORDS CAN BUILD INTERNAL SUCCESS

I can’t prove my life has meaning, but choosing to let it have meaning, at least to myself, in my own mind finding meaning in life makes me feel successful in a way that winning things, having extra money or doing things other people found impressive, never did.

WORDS CAN LIE

One thing I dislike about words is that they can lie, and the lies can have real unfair repercussions such as the Mingi Lie: if babies with teeth that are one top rather than the bottom first are allowed to live the whole village will die from famine. Without words, that wouldn’t happen. Without words rape victims wouldn’t be shamed. There are some dangerous of words, which saddens me, but I’d rather take action against these “word monsters” than pretend they don’t exist.

The myth from CrashCourse Mythology #1: Persephone

That Persephone having been kidnapped to the underworld was responsible for winter and spring because her mom (the goddess of nature was sad when Persephone was with her husband in the underworld and happy when she was back with her on the surface of Earth).

DEMETER DOESN’T CAUSE WINTER THE 23.5° AXIS OF EARTH DOES

The myth is wrong as a real explanation of seasons, because the Northern Half of the world really has spring at the same time the Southern Half has winter. Is Persephone at home with Demeter or not? Can’t be both. Not a good model for seasons.

What “probably” really happened?

The moon hit the Earth a long time ago knocking it over, so it’s all tilted, some planets are not tilted at all or not much Mercury, Venus, Jupiter don’t have seasons as Earth does. Neptune is tilted 28.5° and has 41 year seasons. Seasons are not a given for planets and they are not based on being close or far from the sun, but rather tilted directly towards the line of fire of sunshine or indirectly towards it. Seasons are not a given for a planet to have, I find them beautiful and enjoyable, I think I would miss them if I lived on a space station or a planet with no seasons.

I LIVE A PERSEPHONE LIFESTYLE

The myth of Persephone does have some parallels to my life, I do enjoy living in Hawaii with my dad for 6 months, and with my husband in California for 6 months, which is a bit uncommon. Many animals (especially birds) migrate seasonally, in that way I am like a bird… When I’m gone from my dad, I think he is sad, which is ultimately his issue. Interesting enough, my husband does very well when I am away, he sees his friends, works out, has “him time” and video chats the kids everyday, he misses us a bit and treasures us more when we return (at least for awhile). Perhaps it’s the trauma of loosing us to a divorce that makes my dad less independent emotionally than my husband is or maybe just a lack of comfort with sitting with his feelings without the noise of my kids as a distraction?

Another metaphorical similarity, is that I consider California to be hell in contrast to Hawaii. Though many people like California, maybe even better than Hawaii, I sure don’t. I don’t like the crowds, do like the economic opportunities, don’t like the heat – at all, do like the world class cuisine, don’t like the materialism, do like the museums and national parks. Sometimes leaving my robust support system in Hawaii, where the average person shares many of my values and nature is deeply in harmony with your soul, going back to urban California really feels like descending into hell. Hawaii may be upper 80s and 100% humid often, but where I live in California 100-114 F (38-45 C) happens yearly, some people like to be inside and some people have air conditioning, not me on either account. So… not trying to complain, but I’m a person who hates the heat, who lives in the heat half the year and that is the number 1 reason I find Southern California to be hellish as much as it’s glamorized and idealized by other people who like the heat or don’t live here.

So, though it isn’t true the myth of Persephone somehow helps me make sense of something large and difficult to conceptualize (my seasonal migration) perhaps that is a useful aspect of mythology?

WORDS CAN HELP TAKE OWNERSHIP OF LIFE

By having a value of the day in my planner (since today) I take psychological ownership of my day in my quest for good, and likewise I take ownership of my week with a stoic quote of the week, week 35 is:

Our life is what our thoughts make it.

– Marcus Aurelius

I take ownership of my year during Kwanzaa, from December 26th – January 1st, which is a huge mindfulness fest that I enjoy.

Those things are small and seemingly insignificant from a financial or outward lens, but there are so major at shifting my mental and emotional outlook from victim-hood to proactivity that I mention them, hoping you can find your own substitute activity that works for you or acknowledge the value of the ones you already have so you don’t toss them aside someday without thinking about how much “the little things” help create balance and well being for all of us.

Words matter.

Words rule.

Words help.

What’s your word of the day, week, or year?

Mine is synergy, to me 2020 was about synergy for bad, and synergy for good.

WORLD EMOJI OF THE YEAR

Pandemic 🦠 VS ✊🏿 Solidarity of Humankind

As of July 16th, 2020

Solidarity Won!

(the Zeitgeist of 2020).

🏆

PHYSICAL TRANSFORMATION

As I change my body I have also changed the relationship I have with my body and myself. I feel it be a little more “Votron-y” than I expected.

“Think little of thy flesh: blood, bones, and a skin; a pretty piece of knit and twisted work, consisting of nerves, veins and arteries; think no more of it, than so.” M.A.

Your body is the harp of your soul and it is yours to bring forth sweet music from it or confused sounds. K.G.

Trust and believe. S.B.

I’ve learned to respect the body as a friend instead of just a vehicle… I’ve started making peace with what it needs and respecting what it gives. 🐒

My body is a good friend, it does a lot for me and asks not much in return. It feels right to respect it and if feels like it does in a small way heal my soul treating it well and for sure it improves my mind’s health, it does matter, it’s not “everything” but it’s more than nothing, we are friends now.

I would go as far as to say the body is one of the Voltron legs, without it, you can for sure live, but with it functional it’s a much easier life. I can’t remember the yellow team member well, but I remember the blue one was kind of a grumpy as* hole… he was always fighting with red while the world was about to end, get over yourself blue ranger… so I guess the body would be yellow ranger, because my body at least isn’t as grumpy as blue ranger.

Actually checking out the series information from 30 years ago, there is a central pilot who is the one who was fighting with the blue pilot (who was injured and replaced with the princess pilot) and there was shifting around of pilots within lion robots, so it wasn’t as cut and dry as I remember it to be at age 5 (or even at age 8).

So actually, in a way the body is the core of our life, at least here on Earth it’s unscrap-able, we need at least the brain part to stay alive. So I guess that would be the black lion or the core (torso and head) of the robot.

I noticed something cool (to me) from the data.

WEEK 1 T25: 64 Minutes wanting to quit. No days off. No pain.

WEEK 2 T25 31 Minutes wanting to quit. 1 Day off. A little pain 1 day.

WEEK 3 T25 20 Minutes wanting to quit. 2 Days off. No pain

WEEK 4 T25 00 Minutes wanting to quit. 0 Days off (1 earned). No pain.

Looking back was interesting, I’ve broken the part of my mind that wants to quit, or give up… which is super intriguing, because I don’t quit writing, or trying to be a good mom, or drawing, it’s like I only had 1 quitter daemon in me and it just handles everything, so when I proved to myself I wouldn’t quit exercise for some reason it just doesn’t show up for anything.

If I were to go back in time I would become more kind and more respectful of my body sooner, since it is in a way the main robot, not just a side robot.

Sure mental health is great, the soul is great (maybe it rules our afterlife), but in this life the body is kind of the leader in at least a slight way and needed to care for it for the most time of the (resting, eating, cleaning) is fairly reasonable considering… 40% of my time goes to my body, but gives me survival 100% of the time, so it’s like a 60% bonus? To me it’s worth it, the more I put in, I’ve been getting extra out.

So it seems like exercise is a good deal in life, not just for the body, but to build confidence that you really are the captain of your soul.

Our family’s number one rule is now “1. Be the captain,” (so I obviously have to life by it or my husband and daughter will heckle me right away… that’s how they are) but I feel like the physical transformation is really the basis for the quiet strength and respect that powers my upward momentum in other things right now.

FINANCIAL TRANSFORMATION

So I’m using the Robinhood app to do free stock trading investment. If you sign up with my link we both get a random free stock. If you (US readers) enjoy this blog consider doing that, you don’t even have to fund the account to get the free stock. You be asked for your SS due to taxes and to set up banking? but no transfer needs to be made.

This may not impress you, my stock (non-plural), but it impresses me, because I never knew that I would invest or take a healthy attitude towards finance, it’s a baby step, but it’s a step.

I struggled a lot with not understanding interest rates in a visceral way that lead to student load debts ext. When I was born in the 1980s the banks paid a lot of interest and saving made sense, when it stopped making sense my parents didn’t adjust, nor did any one clue me that putting money in the bank is good for “them” to invest it, not for “me”…

When my son turned 1 we got him a stock because it seemed cute somehow and we had a little money for his birthday and nothing he needed at all.

My daughter then bought some out of envy, my husband finally used the money he was sitting on in his investment app uninvested for months and now me, now it’s all of us.

I feel pretty good about the $3, because I didn’t transfer it, it was literally free money. Whatever I make of it, it has almost become like a fairy tale to me. I would love to pay my student loan with dividends or donate to help the orphans from Elevate Orphan… but the money feels so free. And the experience feels so freeing and so empowering and so uplifting.

My first goal is to wait until the stock reaches $5 or $6 and then sell it so I can invest in $0.40-$1.00 range allowing me to diversify into 3 or 4 different areas of investment. I will have a much different investment strategy then my husband, but it will be so much less stress, since it’s “found money.”

I could probably keep the VBIV stock I have, it seem it will do okay over time since they sell Hep-B vaccines, but I’d just rather not. So I’m waiting to sell a bit higher and bet on some other stock ponies.

It’s irrational how having stocks give me more optimism about fiances, but why not? Student debt, with no savings, and no stocks isn’t ANY better than student debt, no savings, and a stock. Just makes me feel good that my money (small as it is) could go make money itself to either substitute me doing it or at least assist me. Finally passive income.

FAMILY TRANSFORMATION

Still watching Nanny 911 on the weekend as a family, it’s helpful in planing your play for the whole team to be aware of what you are doing. I like it, the kids don’t copy the other “bad” kids surprisingly. We watched season 1, episode 8, 9, 10 and 11 this week. I’ve noticed that my daughter wants more emotional support, but there is no magic fix that between my husband and I we don’t want to give her as much as she requisitions on a daily basis. It’s still good to know what’s going on. Right now, she wants me to look at an orange butterfly that I don’t want to look at. I like butterflies, but she has me on 100% notifications of butterflies level and that’s too much for me.

My daughter gave up already being a vegetarian, but it felt good to support her to make her own choice, I was 100% behind her offering her a bunch of options, so now she is back on meat, but that fine’s too.

SOUL TRANSFORMATION

Listening to T is for Transformation, again this week:

Shaun gave my 7 exercises, that will probably take at least 6 weeks or so,

Exercise 1 = Get a check-up: Done, thanks weird kidney pain, blood, urine all normal. See something about me is normal! I’m supposed to make 3 health steps: perhaps veggie dinner, flax oil in the morning, no coffee after 1PM?

Exercise 2 = Fitness Test
1. Run 15 minutes how far? 2. Plank how long? 3. Push ups 1 minute 2. 4. Crunches 1 minute. 5. Stand without hands. Y/N?

Not looking forward to it, but I’ll shoot for finishing by next week… I have no idea how to track the running and I defiantly don’t care to do it.

Pretending to talk with Shaun (That’s not weird):

👨🏾 <What’s important to you?

👩<I guess having life balance between enjoying the simple things in life, going slow when I can and sucking up things I hate when it does make sense for the team (ie my kids) I also want to find out more about myself, feel whole, explore my mind creatively, intellectually.

👨🏾 <Who’s important to you?

👩<The immediate family, the writer group, human kind within reason.

👨🏾 <What’s driving you forward?

👩<There is a belief that it matters, that if I keep trying crazy projects one or more will eventually take off and I’ll find my place in this big world.

👨🏾< Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.

👩<I am already uncomfortable, but still willing to be more uncomfortable.

MENTAL TRANSFORMATION

The drawing tablet came and it’s been therapeutic.

Just looking at Voltron again, I think for me, black lion is the body, green lion finance (arms are less important too me), red lion relationships and family teamwork (it’s great when we work well, but when we don’t it doesn’t kill me – unlike the body which is really essential), blue is like the soul and yellow is the mind.

It’s interesting that there isn’t a huge focus on physical health for moms, but that would be really essential to expecting them to be well and function at their best. I think there is a larger focus on physical health for dads, and obviously a larger financial expectation, but I think there is a lack of expecting either parents to make times to get their minds and souls straightened out, which is pretty neccisary to be at your best.

I think at all times since becoming pregnant and having kids most people I know have told me repeatedly not to take care of myself and put the kids needs first constantly and my husband as well when possible. I was already a “team player” when that happened and I’ve crawled pretty far down a hole of prioritizing what I want or need last that it’s going to take sometime to crawl back out. I may be overly hostile, but it’s only that hostility that powers me to climb out of this hole I’m only now recognizing I’ve been in.

The funny thing to me about my mind and soul is that I have a very serious mind and a very silly soul, kind of like Bert and Ernie from sesame street, I’m kind of functionally handicapped in my team work and finance arms, but my body is very athletic and I’ll defiantly rely on the one not broken part about me to pull me forward into a sense of wholeness.

I think parenting, as rewarding as it is, was also soul crushingly different and grueling and mentally difficult, so that my mind and soul were quite damaged and need some repair or at least maintenance. I need a lot more “me time” than what I have gotten, so it’s not really shameful to be in a state of disrepair, it’s is what it is.

At times I wonder if my silly things are important I think I’m starting to understand why they are… I think they heal my soul from past wounds.

A LONG LONG TIME AGO (1995?)

As a late elementary school girl I fell in love with this monkey who was even more irreverent than a quite funky and irreverent Japanese game (Earthbound) already was.

The monkey joins your adventure briefly to help you fly where you could not otherwise get to, and then leaves to pursue a love interest.

That’s what my website and blog are named after, the mistaken name of that monkey (which was actually “bubble monkey” and I always thought of as bubble gum monkey…).

I have never introspected exactly why it had such a big impact on me, as silly as it is I kind of think of that monkey as a hero, it reminds me of the kindness of strangers, the good part of humanity (or monkey kind?) and inspires me that it does matter what good I can do, not only for myself but for the larger world (albeit in a tiny way).

It gives me the pond ripple feeling of making a difference in life that Bruce Lee talked about.

I had never known the artist’s name before, just the writers name, the writer is a very famous comedian and game maker Shigesato Itoi known as “mother,” but the artist is Kouichi Ooyama (I’m sure among other team members as well).

This may not be your favorite art style, but it is deeply up there for me, and I think that’s an important thing to develop as an artist letting go of what high society or sales or any one else says is good and finding what resonates authentically with your own soul.

I just got a graphics tablet – thank you husband – (very affordable to use with my Chrome OS, affordable Chromebook which technically belongs to my daughter who got it from her grandfather on her second birthday) I tired about 5 drawing apps and the one that works the best is Krita. Most drawing programs are not even an option using a Chrome OS… Autodesk Sketchbook kind of works (but doesn’t show the cursor so I don’t know where I am drawing) Krita is a good alternative, but seems to be a little less intrinsic and possibly “crashy” or maybe just because I don’t know how to use it well yet?

TODAY MY FIRST DIGITAL DRAWING

SOMEONE ELSE’S DRAWING

I’m heavily a fan of Sumi-E which is a Japanese minimalist art form of attempting to capture the essence or spirit of a living thing with few extra brush strokes.

I’m open to picking up many more techniques, some shading, some color theory, some perspective, the water effect, yet I’m also decently happy with my very simple drawing, because to me, mine captures the emotions that I have always imagined Tessie and Bubble Monkey have in that moment.

So, I wouldn’t hate if my drawing looked good like the Galatic Dinosaur’s, but actually I don’t hate mine, I like it and I only see it getting better over time.

In summary:

Body – Working out for a month coming up soon.

Finances – Started investing, portfolio at $3.30, debt at $34K…

Family – We have a decent working order, love, good education and the beginning of better communication.

Soul – I’m still finding myself, but I feel like the stronger I get the less afraid I am of what I may find and therefore the more I can even look.

Mind – Drawing really lifts my spirits, hopefully I’ll be able to share that with the world someday, but even if I don’t that’s a good foundation to strengthen myself to help my loved ones…

Thank you for making it through another twisted post, I find the threads that seemed tangled are actually meant to weave a tapestry together (or so I think).

I’ve noticed all the images I copied over to posts tend to get messed up, the ones I save and upload are fine, so that someday soon it will be time to return to the semi-recent past and fix and I suppose revise/proof read the older posts for glaring grammatical errors ext. If anyone wants to trade articles for proof reading let me know please!

It’s been a year of baby steps for me, my son’s actually baby steps, but also my own.

👣