Omnia mutantur nos et mutamur in illis…

Saturday/Creative Day: Last week we went to coconut island, to fish and play with our friends, I had a really good time with the little boat. This week “Surf N Turf” the Mokupapa Center and the Zoo, I really enjoyed it. The zoo was a fun place to do big bubbles. It was nice watching new kids have fun with the giant bubbles. There was a lady I don’t care for at the petting zoo, but I had to let it go since I was with the kids. There are certain people not worth talking to or engaging with, negative hateful people who just aren’t worth the time it would take to get frustrated by. I’m excited to use more resources around us in our community such as the knot tying at the Mokupapa Center, their robotics program, I’m not sure what else, but I’m happy to be integrating into the other educational resources in our area. When I do our paperwork I have to describe how are we integrating into our area and I’m happy we are doing it in a real sense instead of half way fabricating a connection that doesn’t exisit for paperwork. That’s not who I want to be.

Sunday/Faith Day: Last week we went to the bay, the kids had a lot of fun on that dirt/sand beach. This week I wore my new dance clothes and did break dancing after visiting the Observatory, very nice day for me. Played at a new rec center and it was fun to be somewhere different. I like the kids, the place and the vibe there. I was happy to check out Imi Loa Observatory’s children’s museum, their shows are included so we watched a really inspiring show about how people see the Orion constellation as a drum, or part of a canoe in different parts of the world, the thunder bird was cool as well. Orion was a personal favorite, because it was easy to see the three in a row and I had trouble and also because I like archery. I’m happy I can still see it after moving far back and forth in the pacific. The dance class was very helpful, I’m finally getting better at my six step.

Monday/Unity Day: Last week we finished my daughter’s Social Studies and got more focused on Math. This week we had a lazy day covering some school work, but then went out to help a friend after, which is nice as long as we are not too behind on our own home and schoolwork.

Clutter Fight Club: Helped a friend instead of myself this week, happy for their progress. In my own home I’m realizing having it not cleaner makes me afraid of new people, but I’m okay having people I’m already used to over. I’m afraid the kids may get hurt more than that it’s messy… which is a factor too, but especially the unsafe paths make me worry. (Later in the week I did some cleaning, not really decluttering, but that is good too, to get the dust and mold and grime off surfaces before it takes a deep hold.

Tuesday/Self-Determination: Last week I worked on reseeding the lawn, it’s been crazy rainy so hopefully the seeds are happy and not washed away, time will tell. Went to help a friend set up a school area, it went well and I’m happy it got done, it feels like something I wanted to do coming together. Caught up on paperwork a little bit so that feels really good to not have it hanging over my head as much. I thought we would run into someone better at paperwork than I was, but in the end we didn’t yet so I am working on finishing that just as I have been working on finishing my cleaning project. I’m happy to get those two things done, I also want to get my garden cleaned up and check on all the Farm Together Gardens, that’s defiantly my favorite program I’ve been a part of lately.

Wednesday/Collective Work Day: Last week I worked on transcripts and worksheets at home, I saw that I wanted to step away from a lot of group stuff, but not all, then I actually did, writing about it/realizing it help me live my truth more. Today I am ready to go back and I am happy to go and I am aligned with why I started and what I want to do in the future, sometimes a reset is important. Planted mamake and ohia seeds, hoping for a cell germination on peat moss to be better than what so far hasn’t worked. I really enjoyed some new kids enjoying music time, the same kids for martial arts and story time, but I was happy that it worked out and I liked how much deeper people got to explore the instruments with less going on and less people to wait for, it did feel a little empty, but also low pressure and casual and beautiful. I had time to really talk to my friends, I wouldn’t mind if it was always a small group. Later I bought replacement headphones for school and dice and number lines for math club, trying to keep my spending down and be conscious of it.

Thursday/Cooperative Economics Day: Last week my daughter finished Social Studies, and I took a more positive attitude towards cleaning. This week I did a lot more cleaning, I have guests coming over Friday so I wanted to make sure I cleaned but the day started with an airport drop off, then laundry pick up (we saw a cool rainbow on the way), then washing laundry and blankets most the day, doing school and cleaning the house. The bathroom I don’t clean as much took 25 minutes, the normal one only 10 since I did it last week, the back bedroom I don’t usually clean took at least 50 minutes and was full of mold, water and broken systems of trash, laundry and returning dishes… a lot less clothes than in the past, which is good to let air circulate. I started the hall, Livingroom, moved the sofa to clean the floor, then got really tired, which is okay because it was really late after just those 2.5 rooms… tomorrow I really should clean the kitchen and fridge because we are going to cook and the fridge smells gross. I’ve gotten really good at dishes and laundry, but I’m still not the best at organizing and I don’t know at all about grout and detailed cleaning yet.

Friday/Creativity Day: Last week we dropped off new milkweed sprouts and planted sunflowers. We had a fun cooking competition and got new gravel for the garden. It was a lovely day, two shifts of friends came over and it was nice, but time seemed to fly by. I do like having friends, getting support, learning new things, but also it seems like with a lot of friends over there isn’t time to think about life and goals. So a middle ground is nice with some days together and some days apart to think about what to do next and to breathe and enjoy life. I like cleaning for friends to come over, I like gardening and playing together, but I like reading and drawing by myself so I value some quiet and tranquil moments built into the week so I don’t forget that I like that time to myself. I’m struggling with a balance still.

GARDEN CLUB GOALS: Adventure Garden: Plank Road, Milkweed (six). Front-Front: Trying to spout Mamake (seeds ordered).

Jungle Garden: Central Garden further mulch and garden bed weeding. Practice Ladder Knott. Test Ladder.

Tropical Garden: Organize Plant Starts.

Farm Garden: Central Clearing, Moon Arch, Veggie Beds, Solar pump.

FARM TOGETHER GOALS: Starting mamake, ‘Ohia (0/100), sandalwood, koa and watermelon.

PROJECTS: Waterproof mortar for pond repair. Passport. Backyard road.

CLUTTER FIGHT CLUB: Demold living room. Declutter my bedroom items.

Last Year to This Year

Last Year: I wanted to plant lavender, I don’t have any large ones, but I do have starts I was able to germinate from seeds. I did fix the small pond, I did read to the kids and I am getting more organized, so a lot of things came to pass and some other things I’m working on still. I’m still struggling with slugs in the garden. Wondering about my student loans because the two sides of the government are fighting over it in court. “Vacillating between tired of cleaning and tired of a mess. Frustrated with the way my kids prefer to listen if they get punished, I would prefer a kinder gentler world, but they simply don’t respond to positive reinforcement without negative reinforcement no matter what studies say, my kids won’t behave without periodic punishment.” that was last year and it’s exactly the same feeling still… happy for spring cleanliness, but tired by the cleaning. I should take care of the blueberries we planted last year. Last year I tried sprouting soursop seeds and got impatient, this year I heated the seeds via paper towel method instead of direct sow and it went much faster. Looking at the pictures of this room from last year is fun, last year kids stuff dominated this room, this year this room is dominated by my non-profit stuff and my style, so it’s fun that it became my space, because I hadn’t really claimed any space since getting married. The living room used to have our lizard, but this year we aren’t keeping caged lizards anymore, that’s helpful to not have the cage to clean and crickets to buy. I like lizards, but I don’t like pet care. I was super sad my friends were leaving but kept moving forward making elephant toothpaste for the kids at the beach, demolding my house and growing blueberries, three things I’m still up to this year again.

VALUES REFLECTION REMINDERS:

SAT Creativity thinking of new ways to do better. It was nice being next to a giant butterfly for bubble time, it felt different than bubbles at the beach. Trying a new recipe for the bubble mix was worth it. SUN Faith in myself. I was camping last year, but this year we are starting more classes and I want to help nurture their start up through the rough scheduling and feeling out locations/routines/equipment phase. MON Unity, feeling comfortable in a family. I am not comfortable with my dad still, but being around my friends helps a lot, we are supporting one another more and more. TUE Proactivity, know what I want. I am getting more in touch with my intentions, what makes me happy, what I think is right than ever before. WED Teamwork smarter group work. It was really good to do a reset of my own activities, although I am helping with other classes I see that I let mine slide and become disorganized in the process, I’m glad I was able to make corrections to bring it back into my life and the communities life. THR Connection, sharing my passion with the world/accepting others gifts. I am getting better at coordinating with the other directors, for a long time we didn’t talk via text much and when we sometimes missed eachother we fell more and more out of the loop, I’m glad we are starting to all be on the same page again. FRI Purpose know what I can do. I didn’t realize it but I would find out I’m a good bubble chemist on Saturday.

I learned this last year: א (alef), ב (beit) , ג (gimel), ד (daled), ה (hei), ו (vav), ז (Zain), ח (get), ט (tet), י (yod), כ (kaf), ל (lamed), מ (mem), נ (noon), ס (sameh), ע (Ain), פ (pey), צ( tsadik), ק (kuf), ר (reish) , ש (shin), ת (taf).

This Year: I’m starting to feel more of myself after having kids, my youngest is 4 now, I feel like I have my own identity again, I’m taking care of my appearance better (not for dating, but just to look presentable and normal or well), I have my own room space for now, I feel like I have a job, even though it’s not a paying job, and I feel like I have a purpose outside of my kids, to help people garden. There are a lot of changes with the scouting group, I feel like they are really positive changes that will set us up to grow in a healthy way for the future. That we can and will stay authentically who we started as being as long as we keep checking in with our intentions.

Live – Lift – Love

Live – I feel really alive when I loaned a friend my extra monitor after I said I would, that I can say I will do something and then do it makes me happy.

Lift – I am supporting new classes and clubs that I think will really benefit the kids and people in our area, I’m excited to empower other people to know they can teach before they have everything perfect or the perfect class structure or venue…

Love – I love that some of my friends understand me, some still don’t, but that there are so many that do get my humor or understand what I mean and especially that respect my dreams and boundaries, I love being around my friends again for the first time since Jr. High…it was draining socializing after the pandemic, but I’ve become less drained by it and had some interesting experiences because of my friends.

Our first coding student from last year’s coding camp finished the next coding course, that is very inspiring to me.

🖥️

Omnia mutantur nos et mutamur in illis.

Be the change you wish to see in the world.

– Author Unknown

Saturday/Creative Day: Last week we went to the Museum of Science and Technology. This week we went to coconut island, to fish and play with our friends. It went well setting up and crossing the bridge, for some reason being on a smaller island across from an island makes me more aware of how much food we do or don’t have… I want to figure out something good to bring eventually. We had fun between fishing, boating and playing in the sand. I love that little island, it feels like a metaphor, it feels healing and it is very beautiful. We dropped off my husband to the airport at the end of the day, my daughter was sad and my son was alright, the opposite of the last time. I guess we need people, or feel we do, differently at different times in life.

Sunday/Faith Day: Last week we had a garden day, a little composting, some weed cloth laying (going to lay more weed cloth/mulch). This week we went to the bay, the kids have a lot of fun on that dirt/sand beach, it’s extremely sunny. I think we all got burnt even with two applications of sunscreen. Possibly if we hadn’t just come from the beach the day before we would have been okay. I think in the future mandatory hats at the bay front, it seems much brighter than our normal beaches are. My dad went fishing, I guess that works for him. In the future, maybe a cold juice and hats. Probably do half a day of school in the morning because we didn’t leave until about noon anyways. Early lunch, make juice in the morning and muffins… Perhaps music class in the morning and just a quick water of the garden. Maybe once a month instead of twice… I talked to my sister about wanting more balance and she said schedule down time first instead of last.

Monday/Unity Day: Last week we covered some extra English to kind of catch up with the academic year. We did Social Studies and Math, covered reading before lunch, then outside time after lunch. It was cute, my daughter learned to swing. I got annoyed with my father trying the micromanage my daughter’s swinging… I was happy she did what she wanted anyways, but sad that he doesn’t have more manners or sense than a seven year old. We tolerate his argumentative nature, but it keeps us from really respecting him. Respect is a two way street, people who don’t address others respectfully will never really be respectable themselves in a true sense. We got our new dance floor in and I put it away in it’s rolling carts, I charged the speakers, changed the mics batteries, unboxed the projector screen, cut the golf lawn with a hand sickle, electric grass cutter, manual grass cutter and weed whacker. All have certain advantages. The weed whacker doesn’t take out stems better then the hand sickle, the manual grass cutter separates dandelions from grass well. I don’t like the weed whacker much… but I do see a speed advantage, though I feel less connected to nature and the plants which takes away from the joy of gardening for me. I guess it could be good to maintain something, but it doesn’t feel as helpful for designing and feeling out the terrain and soil. Started my values reflection again, that feels good, so I’m starting to get more organized at home, in the garden and kind of existentially as well. I wanted to help a friend set up a garden and another tidy up and I was able to do those things, so yes I have my own garden and home to tidy, but I’m happy to be able to rise together, to give and take help in a way I wasn’t used to doing before. It feels good getting some new clothes and new uniforms for the kid’s homeschool.

Clutter Fight Club: I cleaned my own room today, moving the bed and shelves, wiping the windows and shelves down with anti-mold spray. Cleaning the baseboards, floor and tables with vinegar. First I put everything misc into laundry baskets, then I started separating obvious trash out, then I saw some items should be together, dance class items, martial arts/exercise items, prizes for school, pens for white boards, pens/pencils not for white boards, camping stuff, movie making stuff, my personal clothes, clothes that rarely get used. I put the laundry away as I found it, I put things for my friends in bags depending on what friend they are headed out to, I started putting garden stuff together.

In the office I didn’t start much, just putting papers vertical, books vertical, and pens away.

In the garden I used old soil/soil bags for new sunflowers and milkweed plants, potted the chayote in soil, and moved my second generation sunflowers from soaking to toilet tissue/zip lock germination bags. I moved the bokashi outside (long in coming), and set up the next aeurogarden headed out bound, I wiped down the patio tables, which felt good, it had been a long time. Everything sat fallow in the colder part of winter, but it’s locally spring already where I am, the seeds sprout in 1-2 days and it just feels hot already after a stormy and cold start to the year.

Tuesday/Self-Determination: Last week I we finished building the picnic table, it felt good to finish a project as a three generation team. Today I worked on reseeding the lawn. It’s been a long time since I put in the golf green in the back yard, it wasn’t hard to start a lawn, but it’s different than a green in that a golf green is very low, even the high part is lower than the low part of a lawn. So without spending a lot I hadn’t figured out how to trim the grass to the right height yet. Still experimenting with that. I sowed what I think will be better grass for our area, it’s Bent Creeping Grass instead of Bermuda. There is still some wild grass and weeds that can be removed, but I’ve been removing the weeds and fallen leaves in general and raked to try to aerate the soil, then I used a hose setting to try to break up the soil, now it’s a waiting game to see how the new grass does, I’m debating adding a higher plastic margin around the grass to keep more weeds out…

Wednesday/Collective Work Day: Last week we went to the arboretum and the waterfall. This week it’s raining and we cancelled our friend meet up, it’s pretty relaxing. Lets me work on transcripts and worksheets at home. Got a lot of report cards printed out… It felt good to be home and sort half my bedroom clutter, a lot of tiny items just needed to get returned and other items needed new homes with the room evolving after my husband moved rooms and then the kids moved rooms and the room returned to me unexpectedly. Unexpected would be a good word to describe my life right now. I’m homeschool kids I didn’t know I would have, separated to a husband I didn’t know I would get married to, working at a non-profit I didn’t expect to form, and trying to make it jive with what I think my true purpose or at least true happiness in life is, gardening/farming. I like to grow food to spiritually connect kids or people to Earth, not about volume or profit, but just sharing that joy of growing. I also like to design garden areas that set the scene of healing, healing the soul from the stress and constant barrage of modern life. Detox Gardens… Soul Sanctuaries. Altars of Nature… not sure how to call it, but I can see where my abilities, strengths, education, and life experiences intersect is more along the lines of gardening and less towards people, even though I’m stewarding our scout group as best as I can I don’t want to always be involved with event planning, notifying people, supporting other people’s goals/education/growth. I can’t wait for the day I can step away from all non-gardening aspects of the group stuff.

Thursday/Cooperative Economics Day: Last week planted sunflowers in a friend’s garden. This week the kids were sleepy, it’s just a sleepy day this morning. I do like not having to start the day early because we are homeschooling. For awhile I was trying to compete with regular school, keep the same hours ext. Now I keep as many hours, but we start later if we want to, fill in weekends if we want to ext. I’m trying to use my advantages where I can since I have disadvantages of having to source teachers for theatre, music, exercise and having to buy science, playground and shop equipment… I’m happy that I do have support from other homeschoolers. My daughter finished Social Studies, which is usually a happy day, but my daughter was very emotional and felt like a regression of her 6 year old self who just started school and was rebelling against the idea of having to put in a normal student work day. I can’t abide a student not studying, so we pushed through the day, I hope I was kind, but I know I got results. I’m excited to be getting some gravel and some new bamboo, it’s going to be beautiful here someday. I’m happy to get things done and upgrade the house, but I’m also happy with myself right now, I feel like I’m starting to improve myself in the way I bite off small responsibility, like cleaning the bathroom in the morning. There are still more things that could get done, but I’ve started to get a handle on “regular people stuff” like cleaning up, putting things away when I come home, accepting the cost of gas, charging my cell phone…

Friday/Creativity Day: Last week we went to visit my husband’s coworkers and found koa seeds. This week we dropped off new milkweed sprouts to be raised in a warmer garden, planted in ground red sunflowers, dawf sunflowers, teddy sunflowers and kale, delivered white sunflowers and an aeuroponic garden system with some spring seeds from the community seed bank. A lot of changes in the garden in just a day. The kids got to paint with a really awesome instructor, which was nice. We made nan from a new recipe that was pretty good, 3 cups of warm water with 6 TS sugar, 4 TS yeast proofed for 15 minutes, 6 cups of flour, 1.5 TS salt, 3/4 TS baking powder, 3 TBS oil, stir, kneed, rest for 30-90 minutes in an oiled bowl with a towel over.

GARDEN CLUB GOALS: Adventure Garden: Plank Road, Milkweed (six). Front-Front: Trying to spout Mamake (seeds ordered).

Jungle Garden: Central Garden further mulch and garden bed weeding. Practice Ladder Knott. Test Ladder.

Tropical Garden: Organize Plant Starts.

Farm Garden: Central Clearing, Moon Arch, Veggie Beds, Solar pump.

FARM TOGETHER GOALS: Starting mamake, ‘Ohia (0/100), sandalwood, koa and watermelon.

PROJECTS: Waterproof mortar for pond repair. Passport. Backyard road.

CLUTTER FIGHT CLUB: Demold living room. Declutter my bedroom items.

Last Year to This Year

Last Year: I felt overwhelmed socializing, but this year I reconnected with myself, I’m doing good things, helping start speech and breakdancing was right for me, even if other people won’t understand why I diverted my time and energy from what they preferred, it was right for me. Last year it was a huge effort to feel in public and this year I feel better than I ever have, because I represent people without voices, trees, kids, quieter introverts, remembering the people I care about most gives me the strength to face embarrassment, misunderstanding, tension and ridicule. Maybe it’s just getting older too, I know teens have trouble speaking up, it’s also the supportive people in my life lifting my spirits.

VALUES REFLECTION REMINDERS:

SAT Creativity thinking of new ways to do better. This week felt really good as far as the changes we have made to move public things to the weekend have felt right and worked out really well now that we dropped the midweek days for now. It makes me feel like we made the right decision to shift to weekends publicly (our scout non-profit) and to enjoy our weekdays casually again. The week becomes more creative again because we are trying new things and open to new ideas and places, it’s almost like an artist’s date now. I’m really enjoying it. SUN Faith in myself. I feel a little scared, about being able to step up to help with camping, and being able to meet my own projects of gardening/farming/forest restoration and doing the non-profit paperwork and doing homeschool well, I’m looking forward to my husband getting us a home so I can take a vacation half the year. I’ll be trying my best to support the new classes though. MON Unity, feeling comfortable in a family. This week I felt really comfortable with my own kids, with being apart from my husband, with letting my sister have some time apart from us. I am still not comfortable with my dad, it seems like no matter what we do to compromise with him, he will sulk about people not wanting to do everything his way, so it makes me feel like not even trying to harmonize with him at all. So mentally I know it’s easier to work together, but emotionally I have no desire to set myself up for disappointment. TUE Proactivity, know what I want. I’m starting to know myself, but it’s backwards somewhat, meaning I know what I don’t want in my life. WED Teamwork smarter group work. It’s been scary communicating more, but it’s leading to people having the activities they want more. THR Connection, sharing my passion with the world/accepting others gifts. I didn’t realize it but I would be experiencing it on Sunday at dance class. FRI Purpose know what I can do. I didn’t realize it but I would find out I’m a good bubble chemist on Saturday. SAT Creativity thinking of new ways to do better. I lived this by trying a new bubble recipe and a new meet up and both went really well.

Last year we grew daffodils are a garden club, this year lilies instead. Last year I had a stomach ache too, I wonder at the similarities from year to year that occur on the same days. I was sad/happy my good friends were leaving/staying a bit longer. The group was growing and I was enjoying it, enjoying my kids spending more time with other kids.

I learned this last year: א (alef), ב (beit) , ג (gimel), ד, (daled), ה (hei), ו, (vav), ז (Zain), ח, (get), ט (tet), י (yod), כ (kaf), ל (lamed), מ (mem), נ (noon), ס (sameh), ע (Ain), פ (pey), צ( tsadik), ק (kuf), ר (reish) , ש (shin), ת (taf) and don’t want to forget.

This Year: I made the adjustments I needed to between my social life and home life, between my professional life and social life, between my kid’s educational and family lives, boundaries make life better. But there was a backlash.

Live – Lift – Love

Live – I feel really alive when I complete my own goals, even if they are silly or small, I accidently got sucked into completing other people’s goals to the extent I didn’t have enough time for my own anymore. I’m starting to find out what is comfortable for me to give and what I need to keep for myself, it’s been really good for me and in the long term good for those around me so I’m not completely burnt out of the services I am comfortable helping out with.

Lift – I am helping with healing garden spaces because I want to, I am helping start new educational classes because I want to, I am not running a large social club, because I don’t want to, I’m not worrying about the future right now, because I feel like I can’t bear that emotional drain right now.

Love – Things feel chaotic, like winds of change, so I’m trying to be a leaf on the wind at peace, but focusing on things I love, my friend’s first sunflower sprouting, my other friend germinating seeds in an aeroponic garden for the first time, some kids seeing giant bubbles for the first time, seeing middle aged kids still feel comfortable to play at the zoo, hearing jokes from teens that feel safe joking to me, seeing smiles of people that understand my humor, feeling comfortable with friends that we don’t need to talk or look fancy.

I feel inspired today to write 100 good things from this year:

1. My son’s birthday party car track being fun.
2. My son sharing a birthday cake nicely with a friend born close together.
3. A friend baking my son’s birthday cake for us.
4. A gift of home made sunscreen.
5. Making perfume for my God Daughter hoping she will like it.
6. Knowing other people don’t like their birthday too.
7. Piecing my nose again reminding me of being young.
8. My friends worrying about my nose when it had a bandaid.
9. Watching a planetarium show with kids, without getting kicked out.
10. Seeing my friends in person.
11. Seeing my daughter dancing.
12. Seeing my son dancing.
13. Hearing my son sing his own song.
14. Playing Pokemon Battle Royal with my friends and kids.
15. Getting a new book.
16. The library being open again.
17. Pulling my friends in a tiny boat next to a tiny beach.
18. Having good health.
19. Trying to save the forest.
20. Learning to Bokashi precompost for fertilizer.
21. Gathering forest seeds with my kids and kids.
22. Visiting the arboretum and learning more trees.
23. Ordering Japanese Pine Tree Seedlings.
24. Ordering gravel.
25. Getting new bamboo that might grow better in our climate.
26. Saving strawberry seeds from seascape strawberries.
27. Trying to plant a new row of sunflowers.
28. Putting together the front fountain I wanted to do for a long time.
29. Feeling more comfortable dancing.
30. Feeling more comfortable living.
31. Being less scared of being around people.
32. Being less scared to speak up for people who are scared of being around people.
33. Being okay with not liking to clean other people’s messes.
34. Making a boundary class with the All Your Base meme.
35. Enjoying multiplication songs just because I enjoy them.
36. Had a home made soup that was good.
37. Helped my friends enough that I don’t feel guilty.
38. Re-did the Pokemon Periodic Table of Elements
39. Took the time to listen to parents requests for educational programs, even if we can’t do them all.
40. Got a museum pass for the kids again, which is something I like them to have in their life.
41. Restarted theatre class, which is very challenging for me.
42. Made an effort to encourage speech class to start, which was so rewarding and taught me so much.
43. Made an effort to support break dancing class, which is so body positive and helpful for esteem, fitness, and soul health.
44. Made an effort to become comfortable with failure or start a conversation about that.
45. Found a better bubble solution mix to bring costs down and improve quality.
46. Learned new skateboard tricks at 37, which feels fun and amusing and rejuvinating.
47. Built a cool lego castle on the sea with lights and gears.
48. Made a scout frame project and took it to share in public. From harvesting the wood, prep, design and display.
49. Did my first trellis in the garden.
50. Cut bamboo for kid fishing poles.
51. Found something my dad and kids like to do together that is meaningful and fun and healthy instead of just fun for one person and boring for the other.
52. Accepted help more.
53. Accepted my limitations more.
54. Accepted the idea of failure.
55. Bought a new hat and dress, something I don’t do much, I don’t emotionally hope for a good fit that will be worth the money spent.
56. Had my hair dyed pretty with blue and purple.
57. Dared to dream that things can work out with art and music ext someday.
58. Built a gazebo and picnic table in the back yard.
59. Started a grass lawn remodel.
60. Taught my kids their names in Japanese.
61. Restarted language classes in our school.
62. I let people know I believe trying is good enough.
63. I let people know I care about them.
64. I shifted slightly towards healthier food with fiber/protein French Toast.
65. I got help managing my emotions from an unexpected place, other wordpress writers.
66. I got help crossing a physical bridge to an island where we meet now, in the form of a cart from my dad.
67. I got help managing my school from Roger Billings and his school, which still helps me in my day to day quest to educate my kids with current facts and science rather than 50+ year old facts and science that I got taught in my school system…
68. I got help accepting myself by seeing other people struggle to live their truth even if it’s difficult socially.
69. I tried a bread fruit for the first time.
70. I learned more about the stars than I’ve ever known by looking at them across the seasons of a year.
71. I told my friends I love them, but I will prioritize my family and needs first and them second. It was a lot for me to say and even more for me to mean it/do it.
72. I saw my God Daughter grow as an artist and be more vocal about her feelings.
73. I saw many of the students I educate thrive in the subjects they once struggled to complete.
74. I saw that when my friends rise I rise, and when I rise they rise and that we affect one another in a hidden, but real way.
75. I saw that my life holds a lot of potential for new learning.
76. I was surprised I could organize some clutter I was struggling to organize in the past.
77. I saw when I help others garden I learn a lot.
78. I heard very beautiful music at the beach.
79. I felt the sun on my face after sickness and darkness seemed to be all there was.
80. I survived having COVID with asthma.
81. I survived life in general.
82. I am a better parents than my parents, bucket list check.
83. I accept my kids for who they are in my heart, bucket list check.
84. I made friends with some birds.
85. I saw my son smile his sneaky smile.
86. My daughter cooked for me.
87. I learned the miter saw.
88. I feel as strong as I was before having my kids.
89. My soul feels unbroken.
90. I feel happy to be alive in and of itself.
91. I’m okay disappointing people.
92. I turned to internally validating myself after being bullied.
93. I supported my son when he was bleeding that I was there to honor his crying and pain and hurt not diminish it or try to deny it or stop it. That I care for him when he is in pain not just when he is happy, that I’m proud of him when he is weak not just strong, that I’m not embarrassed of him if he has a reason to cry.
94. I noticed about myself that I don’t like tense situations and I allowed myself to choose to opt out of situations beyond my tolerance for comfort.
95. I got less anxious about paperwork, even though I still don’t relish it.
96. I got less scared of writing or publishing public blog posts.
97. I felt less guilty about my own limitations and less ashamed to be myself and be imperfect.
98. I learned to see the line between my goals and other people’s expectations more clearly.
99. I taught a little bit of Chemistry Class.
100. I remembered that the good outweighs the bad and it’s a normal human tendency to imagine the bad as x9 more prevalent than it is to help with survival over an evolutionary timespan.

So it’s a chaotic moment, in a chaotic period of time, in my chaotic life, but focusing on the things that did work gives me some confidence to keep going.

I told a friend once, it’s okay, you are not “leaving,” you are “going,” it’s true for us all the stream of time, we are going forward to whatever is ahead.

🐀

Be the change you wish to see in the world.

– Author Unknown

Saturday/Creative Day: Last week we picked up my husband for a two week visit. This week we went to the Museum of Science and Technology, then we went to the hot springs which are interesting. I really enjoy the museum, and we added in a new speech class that was fun. The kids wanted to keep doing extra speeches it was fun to see that they actually enjoyed the activity instead of just completing it to complete it. The teacher was very good. It was nice to have a weekend activity go well because we are switching from midweek to weekend right now and I don’t know how many activities will be fun vs not fun. It was a busy day, I had fun going back to the hot springs, I had been avoiding it because I hadn’t been there since my friends from Israel left.

Sunday/Faith Day: Last week we went to Essence Island and let the kids swim and play. This week was a garden day, did some composting and checking in with plans of what was going to be done on the site. Going to install more mulch and weed cloth in the central area it’s still a bit untenable. My husband stayed home he was a bit gardened out after helping with a squash trellis the other week. I’m glad my projects are going better at home. I learn a lot at my friend’s gardens about plants and the climate difference and for some reason most my friends are better at large size plant care, I think it may be a steady rain at their climate zone that I don’t have. I lost a few trees to a micro drought that hit before the back to back wind storms and winter rains, my friends mostly don’t have to keep an eye on dry weather. I’m also at 4000 feet and most of my friends are lower down where the elevation won’t be a major factor.

Monday/Unity Day: Last week the kids were happy gardening. This week we covered some extra English and worked on a picnic table. The kids took a walk with me to look for lizards, we found one, but it was run over. We also found some forest seeds and I started trying to plant them on my seed tray. It was a nice walk around the neighborhood, it’s so rainy I seldom have walked around here. My husband gets frustrated easily, it’s more peaceful living by myself than with others, I wonder if when I’m old if I will be left alone and hate it or enjoy it? I guess I should really make more time to be alone before that happens, maybe if I took more time by myself to recharge I would enjoy the company of other people more than I do. Right now I love working with other people, to restore the forest, or do garden work, but not just to waste time, I haven’t learned to enjoy that seemingly basic human ability.

Tuesday/Self-Determination: Last week I was thinking about and getting ready for my son’s birthday. This week all that birthday nostalgia, and stress, and joy feels like it was years ago. I had to switch phones because my service provider wouldn’t provide for the old phone anymore. We dropped off my daughter’s friend who helped with the table. It was nice to finish the picnic table together, my dad helped a lot and was patient with the kids, my husband had trouble working with kids and with us, but at least we were able to finish the project. He doesn’t enjoy making things by hand, I do enjoy it, but when materials cost more I am willing to buy things premade to save that time for teaching or gardening instead of demanding I build everything. Though I do enjoy building, I enjoy other things as well.

Wednesday/Collective Work Day: Last week it was my son’s birthday party and the kids played with a car ramp. This week we went to the arboretum and looked at 110 types of trees. The kids got into map reading. The lychee and tamarind were particularly lovely to stand under and take in shade. I talked to them about ordering Sugi Pines. I loved the experience, it was another experience of visiting someone else’s work, the site was once an animal quarantine, but had been turned into an arboretum that spawned many other arboretum, a rare plant workshop ext. There was a party we didn’t go to, but my husband and I walked the waterfall and the town, I think it’s important to remember that we aren’t people who can go to all the parties, we are people who need to recharge, no matter what other people want or what we want we aren’t socialites by nature. I ordered a mosquito zapper and some fake plant screens to try to give my neighbor back some privacy. Gave out most the photo cups I made, but still going through customer service for cracked ones.

Thursday/Cooperative Economics Day: Last week I ordered some Sugi Pines from the Arboretum. This week went to a friend’s garden, it was cool to set up sunflowers. The sunflowers were the end of a seed pack I got for another friend, they were fun to grow, Mammoths, so they got really tall and it felt successful growing such a tall plant. I was too late to save my seeds on accident, so they got eaten by a mouse or rat after falling to the ground… I would have liked to save them, but life has been so busy that I am not surprised I didn’t have time to do that. My friend’s mom wants to grow cucumbers so that is going to be something new for me, I’ve done peas, but never cucumbers. I know they will need to get covered because of the pickleworm moths here. So I ended up ordering some self pollinating seeds so at least they won’t have to be uncovered and re-covered.

Friday/Creativity Day: Last week we to lunch for my son’s birthday. This week we went to visit my husband’s coworkers, it was a long drive. We found throwing our shoes at koa tree seed pods was enough to knock the mature seeds loose so we picked up a few to bring home to germinate to help the sandalwood trees (which are hemiparasites) grow. When we came back the stars were out, Jupiter, Venus and Mars were aligned more or less and especially Venus was shining super brightly. We put the lights up on the gazebo area, it was really pretty at night, the remote lets us turn them off from inside the house, which is really cool. There is a lot of good in my life right now, but also stress and overspending as well. Overspending in money, but also in energy, in the amount of time I give to others without resting or relaxing. I need to make more time to relax, if it’s 30 minutes or an hour or whatever it is or I’m going to get sick or burnt out.

GARDEN CLUB GOALS: Front: Stone Road, Milkweed (germination process). Back: Safe Paths. Front-Front: Mamake (seeds ordered). Site 2: Central Garden further mulch and garden bed weeding. Practice Ladder Knott. Test Ladder. Site 3: Cherry Tree Support, Organize Plant Starts. Site 4: Central Clearing, Moon Arch, Veggie Beds, Solar pump.

FARM TOGETHER GOALS: Growing 6 kale, 2 rosemary, 1 pear tomatoes, 1 butter lettuce, a bunch of basil. Also starting mamake, ‘Ohia (0/100) and hopefully sandalwood and koa to reforest. Hoping for a watermelon field this year.

PROJECTS: Waterproof mortar for pond repair. Passport.

CLUTTER FIGHT CLUB: Demold living room.

Last Year to This Year

Last Year: I was reflecting on my values more, this year I am taking actions towards goals, which is nice, but I am not really reflecting as much. Next week I will revisit my old value reflections so I remember to do that again, I liked it.

VALUES REFLECTION REMINDERS:

SAT Creativity thinking of new ways to do better. SUN Faith in myself.  MON Unity, feeling comfortable in a family. TUE Proactivity, know what I want. WED Teamwork smarter group work. THR Connection, sharing my passion with the world/accepting others gifts. FRI Purpose know what I can do. SAT Creativity thinking of new ways to do better.

Last year we grew daffodils are a garden club, this year lilies instead. Last year I had a stomach ache too, I wonder at the similarities from year to year that occur on the same days. I was sad/happy my good friends were leaving/staying a bit longer. The group was growing and I was enjoying it, enjoying my kids spending more time with other kids.

I learned this last year: א (alef), ב (beit) , ג (gimel), ד, (daled), ה (hei), ו, (vav), ז (Zain), ח, (get), ט (tet), י (yod), כ (kaf), ל (lamed), מ (mem), נ (noon), ס (sameh), ע (Ain), פ (pey), צ( tsadik), ק (kuf), ר (reish) , ש (shin), ת (taf) and don’t want to forget.

This Year: I think my kids are over involved with other kids and I am overextended with group activities (slightly), so I want to dial that back to find a few hours of rest and fun without our friends on an average week. I’m kind of happy with the way the grass lawn came in, but it’s also very over grown so I’m exploring how to chop that back nicely.

Live – Lift – Love

Live – I feel really alive when I step back and watch the kids have outdoor fun without agendas, even though I want to teach them some things, I think them exploring physics and nature is worthy of time and effort I think to be exploring is to be truly human. It was nice watching the kids explore the boat/ocean interaction, the buoyancy of it of course but also to connect to their ancient sailing roots.

Lift – I am helping create a healing garden (I hope), so I am happy with that because it was something I wanted to do for myself and also for others and now I am able to do it in a few spaces, I like the way a change of environment affects the spirit as well as the physical space.

Love – Things are still shifting, my husband is leaving back to work out of state again, my father for more surgeries, my sister for work and vacation, our group is changing activities ext. But right now it seems like things are shifting to where they should be? The world was shut down, now that it is open there are more places to be so we don’t have to do as much on our own, we can start to rely on a larger community to give us what we need and enjoy a larger community to give back to as well (I love giving plants out).

👞

Be the change you wish to see in the world.

– Author Unknown

Saturday/Creative Day: Last week we went skateboarding. This week a day of transition, we picked up my husband, ended the main cleaning session of our Clutter Fight Club… We had a nice burger, saw a pretty sunset. Got home late after helping change a tire. I had my hair dyed and re-pierced my nose, it makes me feel younger because that is how I had it when I was younger, I like it. I’m not a conservative person and I don’t really like to look conservative, but as parent I didn’t prioritize my hair or fashion for a long time. I’m getting some things done, but I still have the feeling I want to make more progress on other things. So I feel good and bad about what I have been able to do. My son’s birthday is coming soon so I am starting to feel excited about it more now that the other cleaning is done and now that my husband is here to help me with things. My husband came back Saturday. I ended my Kaizen Blitz and loaded up the garden party things. It was nice, we had a hamburger, helped fix a flat tire. I didn’t know how it would feel, but it felt peaceful and nice.

Sunday/Faith Day: Last week we went to the Observatory’s 10th year anniversary. It feels like a long time ago just a week later. We went to Essence Island and let the kids swim and play. I wanted to support our local dance class, but I was too sick. We did go to the beach but just sat and rested as we waited for the kids to finish playing and swimming.

Monday/Unity Day: Last week I went back for a third week of cleaning. This week we did garden club, it was super fun. The kids were running around all happy, on the skate ramp, the trampoline, the farm… I was happy too, putting in a welded wire arch for chayote, putting in grow beds, mixing soil. The arch needs some bamboo for support.

Tuesday/Self-Determination: Last week I had some fry bread that was delicious and cleaned. This week was festive because my son’s birthday was coming up. I didn’t slow down enough to be sad. My son is so smart and sweet, I feel better watching him grow than I did with my daughter who seemed to lack support and have lagging skills, my son seems well liked, supported and growing well, so there is nothing to regret.

Wednesday/Collective Work Day: Last week we stayed home with a sore throat and extreme weather warnings not to go out. This week went well in some ways, the kids had fun with a ramp, my son had a happy birthday, I gave away lilies, but in a different way I saw how hard it was on my friends to host such a large event with me each week, it’s been hard on me too, so it’s time for a change of pace and change of place again to go back to our roots of who we are and also who we want to be now.

Thursday/Cooperative Economics Day: Last week I was decluttering and cleaning. This week ordered Mamake and ‘Ohia seeds from a local non-profit seed bank. I had to think about what we wanted to do, what I wanted to do, what we may be able to do, what we are going to do now and this weekend, then I checked in with the people I could check with.

Friday/Creativity Day: Last week I stayed up really late working on the Pokemon Periodic Table of Elements version 2. This week took my son out for lunch for his 4th birthday and went to Home Depot, got excited there was waterproof mortar. We were able to stain the picnic table today, five of us worked on it and it went faster than I expected, it looks really pretty with dark brown stain. Went out and gathered ‘Ohia seeds to reforest, my goal is to give 10 friends 10 trees each year, so 100 a year, as well as posting the process. I bought some demold spray again.

GARDEN CLUB GOALS: Front: Stone Road, Milkweed. Back: Safe Paths. Front-Front: Mamake. Site 2: Assess. Practice Ladder Knott. Test Ladder. Site 3: Cherry Tree Support, Organize Plant Starts. Site 4: Central Clearing, Moon Arch, Sun and Moon Beds, Squash Trellis 2.0 Reshape. Solar pump.

FARM TOGETHER GOALS: Growing 12 kale, 2 rosemary, 1 pear tomatoes, 2 butter lettuce, a bunch of basil. Also starting mamake, ‘Ohia (0/100) and hopefully sandalwood and koa to reforest. Hoping for a watermelon field this year.

PROJECTS: Assemble picnic table. Waterproof mortar for pond.

CLUTTER FIGHT CLUB: Demold living room.

Last Year to This Year

Last Year: I was sick with a sore throat like I am now, stressed out by my son’s birthday being surrounded by other birthdays, responsibilities and events. Last year I was better on top of school this week, but I don’t think my kids were sick, I don’t like to push them when they aren’t doing well. This year I am more laid back, last year was a sad and hard year more than this one. I learned this last year: א (alef), ב (beit) , ג (gimel), ד, (daled), ה (hei), ו, (vav), ז (Zain), ח, (get), ט (tet), י (yod), כ (kaf), ל (lamed), מ (mem), נ (noon), ס (sameh), ע (Ain), פ (pey), צ( tsadik), ק (kuf), ר (reish) , ש (shin), ת (taf) and don’t want to forget.

This Year: I am more aware of myself and what bothers me, still stressed, but less ashamed to be human and to be myself. I still have a lot of goals that are the same from last year to this year, but I also see completed goals of things I wanted to do and then did do. I have too many building and garden goals that are above my skill level, it’s okay as long as I’m okay with it taking time to achieve them. Usually my goals aren’t relevant from one year to the next, but this year the goals I set last year still feel current, like a year hasn’t passed in my heart – only on the calendar. I don’t know why last year bled into this one, but the pandemic felt like it melted year separating rituals and events and also year ending ones…

Live – Lift – Love

Live – I feel really alive gardening and now woodworking, I feel really alive at the beach, but don’t mind a break. I want to keep doing things that allow me to feel alive, but the things can change. I am excited to try to repair my green house and plant milkweed in the front garden.

Lift – I am helping my friends, but I am trying to do what I can and not more than I can. One friend needs accountability getting her space in order, one needs distance from a painful problem, myself I need to see my limits but not despair in them and organize my home, garden and paperwork.

Love – Things are shifting, but I am glad the 2.0 of our group ended with lilies and I feel full of hope entering our 3.0 which will have more plants and gardening, less ocean and martial arts, but hopefully joy and horizontal growth. I love that we ended that chapter with lilies.

💐

Be the change you wish to see in the world.

– Author Unknown

Saturday/Creative Day: Last week there was a storm, the storm in our area. This week we went skateboarding but everyone was a bit tired. A lot of plans shifting due to the bad weather, flights shifted, outdoor events shifted, a restless wondering if things will be canceled or not cancelled. The sun came out for a bit and that felt nice, then I did some cleaning work towards my goal, but I don’t know how I feel about it. It makes me feel good to see our community help, to be part of that, but I also don’t know if what we are doing is going to have a lasting effect and that makes me wonder if it’s worth neglecting my kids, which to be honest is what happens when I put a lot of work hours into a project or goal. It’s been about a week of school, which we do catch up on because we don’t take all the small holidays off and do shorter summer or winter breaks, still I don’t know what is right or wrong this week, my brain is too fuzzy and overwhelmed to understand priorities properly right now. I learned some new skateboard tricks, but I was a bit too tired and worn down to be happy about it.

Sunday/Faith Day: Last week I felt that I’m getting closer to the three goals I had on my mind last summer, I have been spending a lot of time and money and effort to reach the goals and I wonder in the end if goals are ever worth the work that goes into them, I don’t know if they will be, I feel unsure. We went to the Observatory’s 10th year anniversary and that was fun, I hadn’t been there in awhile and I like the changes. It’s more interactive for younger kids than it was before. It was fun seeing people I knew, I like living in a small town rather than a big city. I felt good because we did cool stuff with the kids and also I worked towards my goals, but by the end of the night I was exhausted so I know I can’t always live at that extreme productivity level that seems so cool for a day or two.

Monday/Unity Day: Last week I cleaned up a friend’s house for the second week. This week I went back for a third week, I didn’t know how much work it would be, sometimes we make a lot of progress in one day with large items or large spaces, but small items and small spaces seem to take much longer and I can’t get a good mental estimate of what is left to do, what the end goal is, what are the steps to that goal and what each person helpings work pace is. My personal garden goals have been on hold, but they would have been anyways because I don’t want to work in this kind of weather.

GARDEN CLUB GOALS: Front: Stone Road, Milkweed. Back: Safe Paths. Site 2: Check In. Practice Ladder Knott. Test Ladder. Site 3: Cherry Tree Support, Organize Plant Starts. Site 4: Central Play Clearing, Moon Arch, Sun and Moon Beds, Squash Trellis.

Tuesday/Self-Determination: Last week cleaning, kind of tired of being in town so much, getting worn down. This week I had some fry bread that was delicious, got a lot of cleaning done it felt like, it’s hard to quantify lately. Seems like everyone is a bit under the weather, sleepy or grumpy lately. Taking the trash out feels good, bagging it feels good, washing the laundry feels good, it feels good getting things cleaner, but on the other hand it feels bad not knowing what will happen, how long is left, how much is left, the uncertainty of it is uncomfortable for me. It hasn’t been at all the right weather to let paint or stain dry so my own projects at home have just gone unfinished.

PROJECTS: Stain Picnic Table.

Wednesday/Collective Work Day: Last week rainy vibe at the beach, there was especially good music. This week I practiced some cello and am starting to get more comfortable bowing, holding the bulky instrument and trying to find the right notes. I am starting to get sick and my daughter is sick, I am admittedly grumpy. I cleaned my own bathroom for 20 minutes. Stuffed the piñatas for my son’s birthday next week. The kids really got on my nerves and the phone. It’s a nice rainy day but it doesn’t get me away from 50 different people with different opinions that kind of interrupt the flow of my day. I guess it’s my fault for checking my phone so much, I’m going to have to check it less. It’s stormy weather with warnings, a large tree fell down and blocked the highway something that happens a lot, but that is why it was good to stay home. It fell after I would have been home, but the weather hasn’t been good for being outside or working in the garden lately. We are all sick with a sore throat I’m hoping it goes away fast, we are also all off kilter with weird weather, the sky has a yellow tinge to it instead of blue, it’s dark during the day and loud at night with rain. My husband told me he is coming on Saturday for two weeks, it’s good to see him, but it’s also disruptive to any kind of easy or normal routine and it will end with the kids missing him and being bad until they get used to him being gone again. I guess a mixed blessing. I guess I feel ambivalent about it.

FARM TOGETHER GOALS: Growing 12 kale, 2 rosemary, 1 pear tomatoes, 2 butter lettuce, a bunch of basil. It’s going good, it was sad cutting the basil that had illness due to aphids/flea beetles, but in the end I think it’s for the best, big plants can tolerate a lot of pest damage, but little ones will often be stunted if they are under too much stress as they grow. Transplanted the monkey pod seeds outside.

CLUTTER FIGHT CLUB: Bathroom, in 20 minutes I could do a basic clean, meaning I sprayed the toilet with vinegar to disinfect it, wiped the toothpaste off the mirror, wiped the sink, wiped the knobs and cabinets, wiped the baseboard and floors, scrubbed the minerals off the toilet, wiped the toilet, threw away shower hair and empty soap, sprayed the dingy mildew off the shower curtain (but didn’t completely fix it). I put toilet paper together and towels together and put away stuff off the counters into the drawer. I sprayed the corners of the shower with vinegar. Stuff I didn’t do for a basic clean, take out under the cabinet and draw stuff, scrub the shower, mold spray the ceiling. I used to hate cleaning the bathroom, but I don’t focus on things I can’t change anymore like the grout color, the size of the bathroom, the stains on the cabinets, now I just sanitize the germs off, put things where they can go that makes sense and call it a day. If I wanted to work on grout or mold I could, but it wouldn’t be part of a basic clean it would be either a detailed clean, seasonal clean, or a house project. Redistricting that distinction in my mind actually helps a lot about not nitpicking things that are not even going to get cleaned and either decided to make it a goal for later or moving on.

Thursday/Cooperative Economics Day: Last week I was taking a break from life not so much my responsibilities as much as my distain for what is coming up soon is draining me. This week did more decluttering than I expected to do, but I hope it makes a positive difference to the future, it’s always hard for me to know what projects will create a wanted outcome and which will be learning experiences of what not to do again. There was more to do than I could have done, and I don’t know if what I did was important or not to whatever the outcome will be, I don’t usually enjoy those conditions, but this year it seemed to be the tide of the zeitgeist to participate and throw in whatever effort I could alongside my friends, loose social pressure I guess.

Friday/Creativity Day: Last week I slept over at my friends house with my kids, it was kind of anti-climatic, the bed was comfortable and it was easy to sleep somewhere new, but my kids weren’t well behaved so there is a component of not relaxing-ness when you are out with kids acting up. Today I am pretty exhausted, but glad that I am starting to read my daughter her new writing book. I shopped for a birthday the day after my son’s birthday. I stayed up really late working on the Pokemon Periodic Table of Elements version 2. The first one was too blurry and this second one is too large of a file to use for printing. So I don’t really know what to do to reduce it down for a shower curtain like I wanted to… Tried on my new dino costume today, I liked it.

Last Year to This Year

Last Year: I was sick with a sore throat like I am now, stressed out by my son’s birthday being surrounded by other birthdays, responsibilities and events. Last year I was better on top of school this week, but I don’t think my kids were sick, I don’t like to push them when they aren’t doing well.

This Year: I am more aware of myself and what bothers me, still stressed, but less ashamed to be human and to be myself. I still have a lot of goals that are the same from last year to this year, but I also see completed goals of things I wanted to do and then did do. I just have too many building and garden goals that are above my skill level, it’s okay as long as I’m okay with it taking time to achieve them. Usually my goals aren’t relevant from one year to the next, but this year the goals I set last year still feel current, like a year hasn’t passed in my heart – only on the calendar.

Live – Lift – Love

Live – I feel really alive gardening and now woodworking, I feel really alive at the beach, I want to keep doing those things that allow me to feel that way. I am excited to try to repair my green house and plant milkweed in the front garden.

Lift – I am happy to be helping to do something that has been on my radar for a long time, but it is hard and tiring too so I can’t ignore the truth of it, I will need some rest soon, but I am happy to get to do what I said I wanted to do, I get to prove my integrity to myself a bit.

Love – The more I do what I say I will the more I love myself. The more I keep teaching martial arts the more I love myself. Wellbeing comes from art, music and the beach, but self love comes from service gardening or teaching martial arts. I can’t wait for the new flower bulbs. I’m happy I made the new Pokemon Periodic Table of Elements, even though I need to find out how to scale it, at least it’s done.

🦖

Kamaʻāina Specialty Permaculture Plant Nursery: Grow, Cook, Eat

GROW

1. Observe and Interact: Last year we grew narcissus, tomatoes, strawberries, morning glories, watermelon, pumpkin, crook neck squash, roses, and nasturtiums. This year I wanted to find out what people wanted to grow/eat directly so I asked our Garden Club, people said kale. Two people… and also beets. Also milkweed, red morning glories, pollinator flowers, beans, peas, and corn. So starting the year with kale for the community and Italian Basil for myself.
2. Catch and Store Energy: My area runs on geothermal and partial solar energy, that runs my aeroponic basins in the kitchen and that is like a catch and store energy system to me. Right now 12 kale are growing on those systems.
3. Obtain a Yield: Right now there are 12 sprouts but I don’t know how long it will take to obtain a yield, I think they will leave my hands as starts and not as traditional plants.
4. Apply Self-Regulation and Accept Feedback:
5. Use and Value Renewable Resources and Services: Part of our electricity is solar and the other part is geothermal so they are both renewable, our water is rainwater and that is renewable.
6. Produce no Waste: Using Bokashi for the plant scraps.
7. Design from Patterns to Details: Trying to replicate the germination station at 3 more houses and then maybe each of those can give starts or training to more germination stations.
8. Integrate Rather Than Segregate: Trying to add on Ohia Lehua, Koa, and Sandalwood reforestation into the Farm Together produce project.
9. Use Small and Slow Solutions: The aeroponic kitchen gardens, the garden club, and starting from seeds are all small and slow solutions.
10. Use and Value Diversity: Looked up the companion plant for kale is onions to keep pests off, so don’t have any onions right now, but possibly will start some with the kale.
11. Use the Edges and Value the Marginal: With Kale eaten raw it will need to be grown semi-indoors in our area so that will help us create transition zones from small aeroponic start areas to medium aeroponic cultivation areas.
12. Create, Use and Respond to Change: In a way kale helps us respond to the Rat Lung parasite in our area by forcing us partially onto aeroponic systems in most areas.

– March 2nd 2023